Page 41 of 46

PostPosted: Wed Nov 07, 2007 8:23 pm
by Eternal_Silence
Hey, I must say like the song ^^. And you don't sing very bad either (maybe a little practice here and there), it fits the song. It sounds a bit simple maybe, but I think it sounds kinda good if you never made a song before. Chill liedje wel ^ ^. Maybe you should put a band together! ;)


PostPosted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 11:47 pm
by A_S
I enjoyed it, too! It was a nice song, simple but pleasant. I think you did a nice job with the singing for your first time. :)

PostPosted: Wed Nov 14, 2007 9:54 pm
by lothlorien
thanks for the nice comments, I really enjoyed making this song and it's nice to hear people like it (^^)

PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 7:54 pm
by Garbo
I write prose with a bit of a bounce (since I don't write in metre)

Such mystery that lurks beyond that shadowy eye
that fragment that Man calls a soul what is a heart?
a pulsating organ comprised of vessels and sinews and tendons?
one that wholly beats abroad my open chest
come out come out heart heart be open and fragile with me
no no no beats the heart deliberately
it feels the gentle aching of your hand
pressed firmly 'gainst the beating breast
it cries out tenderly to stop penetration
of your wit and wisdom like a floating dove
god! these analogies will kill us all
metred heart, metred soul comprised of Hymeny
you're too damn broken to be made hole
no glue can put you back in shape
you little glass house with your little glass knobs
that man comes and turns them, inch by inch
don't open that house i say
dont turn those knobs and those wheels and and dont play with those
don't stare me in the eye you fool
it will blind you all of it
my heart is tendons and sinews and muscle and blood and guts and gore
its metred like the rhythm of poetry
but it hasnt got much more
they play upon it too much, those men
those men i adore
they play on it, pluck the strings and bow the veins
and the sad melody that errupts drives them away
far far far away because melody incites that in them all
but thou hast played thine own tongue in twain
and betwixt my breast there within it lies
that beating thing, that wretched thing
that who stabbed it out has eaten its very life before mine eye
lechers doth taste the sweet stench of the blood of the mishapen lady in her fullest frame of pain and guilt and agony



Not a deity, but rather a being of subordinate clause
I cannot make perfection because I am not wrought of it
But I, who the world so condones for my ignoramous
And for my pride,
Having been spat upon and taught the ways of Man
Have saved up my wealth elsewhere
Outside of knowledge
Outside of beauty
Elegance, radiance, chosenness
My hair is the prairie grasses
Flowing about my gentle frame as my fingers caress
Through them as though a comb
My eyes the darkness of the impending night sky
And my breath the sparsity of the trees
For the winds are me and are in me my thoughts
And no man nor woman nor child nor any of God's gentle creation
Can chase after me for my will is as the lightning strikes
And the chords of my heart are as the rains that rarely come



The Extasie (spelled in reference to Donne)

the sun has faded gone
down the hills behind us
and in your arms do i lay
as tenderly as ever
as you rain kisses upon me
so passionately upon my lips, my eyes, my neck...

oh soft, sweet, still night
in my lover's arms
who calls me to come
and do i so generously obey

he pushes a strand of hair away
and looks me in the eye
they search me still
and i likewise, look to him
as the world melts away
as our souls meet
as our bodies are united
to look into my lover's eyes
the world stops in time
and we are one



Such folly, such enlightened ignorance
Has thus provided our wit to be
Truly and unthinkingably dull and dense
Compact with wordings of intellectual accounts
But devoid of any form of wisdom
Or inherent inner strength
Does the quill to paper spun
An electronic deviation of cunning art
And fabricated satyre.

When once my mind did choose to hear
The still softness of your breathy whisper
Did I not witness in all accounts your brevity?
You, who once was called to attention
In an age of wit and reason, of logic and understanding
Now lost amidst the pages of absolute horror.
Our words are lost in between the ink stained lines of logic
And our soul is tortured amid the fire and ashes.
We, the selfless men who denied the revolutionary tacts
Now burn assunder in the depths of Hades.

PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 8:25 pm
by Niamh
Ok, for school we had to read 'catcher in the rye' and the teacher gave us some assigments we have to hand in next week. She wanted us to write a sonnet about the book. Well. I didn't really know what a sonnet was, so I looked it up on wikipedia ( thanks to wikipedia :P) and I wrote something and I wonder what you think of it :)

A sonnet about Catcher in the Rye

I would rather wear a red hunting hat,
than being just like all others around.
I want to be myself in look and sound
instead of growing up and things like that.

The catcher of children I want to be,
when they start tumbling over the edge,
it’s then I wish to save them with my catch
so they always remain children, you see.

Then I would feel damned satisfied with that.
I don’t feel like giving up my things now,
even though I am lonely and get mad.

So I continue this soliloquy,
‘cause there’s no one for someone like me, who’s
alienated from society.

PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 9:01 pm
by Eternal_Silence
I really like it, Niamh. I only noticed that the word 'then' must be 'than' in the second line, though. If I get the sentence correctly =P.
I'm sure your teacher will be positive about it too ^___^


PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 2:11 pm
by Methica
Nice poem Niamh!! I really like it!!

PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 2:44 pm
by eadgyth
Nice Niamh! I loved that book so much and I think you got the whole essence of it perfectly.

PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 7:34 pm
by Niamh
Eternal_Silence wrote:I really like it, Niamh. I only noticed that the word 'then' must be 'than' in the second line, though. If I get the sentence correctly =P.
I'm sure your teacher will be positive about it too ^___^



Hehe, I always trouble with then and than :P

Thanks for the comments Marlies, Methica and Eadgyth!

PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 8:16 pm
by Eternal_Silence
Niamh wrote:Hehe, I always trouble with then and than :P

Thanks for the comments Marlies, Methica and Eadgyth!


Hehe, it's very easy =P : you use 'than' with a comparison and 'then' with an ehm tijdsbepaling, quickly said ^_^.


PostPosted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 8:41 pm
by Niamh
Ok, I think I ever read about that somewhere but it's good to hear it again :P

PostPosted: Wed Dec 12, 2007 3:42 pm
by Methica
Eternal_Silence wrote:
Niamh wrote:Hehe, I always trouble with then and than :P

Thanks for the comments Marlies, Methica and Eadgyth!


Hehe, it's very easy =P : you use 'than' with a comparison and 'then' with an ehm tijdsbepaling, quickly said ^_^.


I would translate that as "determination of time"...
Since the word tijdsbepaling doesn't excist in English according to my dictionary.. :P

PostPosted: Mon Dec 31, 2007 4:12 am
by Renagade
Garbo, now that was a bit graphic for me...your prose...The Extasie was very nice! :)

Niamh, I enjoyed your A sonnet about Catcher in the Rye, this has sparked my interest :wink: :)

PostPosted: Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:24 pm
by Turlough
Great piece of English poetry, Niamh. In the third stanza you use "damned" as an adverb. Beware that it has a force equal to pounding your fist on the table as you read the poem.
:wink:

PostPosted: Wed Feb 13, 2008 3:10 am
by dragon girl
:wink: :?: I've decided to post another of my songs here. I trust all applicable customs as to the respect of intelectual rights and property will be observed. I'm just being fancy. Don't steal it is my point. I trust you guys.

We Touch Hands
We touch hands across the circle.
We touch hands across the line.
We go toe to toe.
I was yours and you were mine.

We talk every now and then.
We talk brave about the future.
We walk and we talk,
And we say that's human nature.

Chorus: Lives we have.
Lives we had,
But all the weight of all the years
Came between and split our path.

Now we are.
Then we were,
And all the thoughts that came between
Lie there still without a word,
But that's okay,
'Cause now and then
We touch hands


We both laugh about the old times.
We both laugh now in the end.
We cried and we tried,
But we couldn't make amends.

We went on to find our future.
We went on to find our past.
We played and we prayed,
And we hoped that it could last.
(Chorus)
We remember all the laughter.
We remember all the tears.
Remember December,
All the endings of that year.

We keep memories of the night time.
We keep pictures of the days.
We thought and we fought it
Till the parting of our ways.
Bridge: We tried our best, did all we could have.
We held out, long after we should have.

We shake hands across the memories.
We shake hands with hope and love.
We'll make or we'll break it.
We'll take comfort from above.

We'll go find our destinations.
We'll go far and we'll go free.
We won't forget, won't regret
Who we might have meant to be.
(Chorus...)